Say Hello To My Little Friend

This dude lives with us now. We found him wandering around the holiday section of the arts & crafts store last night. Poor fella must have been pretty scared, but I put my hand out and, after sniffing around, he came right up to me and crawled in our cart. I'm glad we could rescue him. It's a hard world for little flocked plastic deer.

Nothing Runs Like A Deer

A poster for Huston's band. No actual deer were harmed in the making of this poster. Okay, there was that one, but that was it. And that was an accident. I swear. Okay, so I shot him, okay? I don't know why you have to always keep judging me because I believe in science.

Oh Deer! There Is Poo On My Foot!

Last night I had a dream that a deer intentionally and maliciously put its rump down on my foot and defecated on it. I think it may have even looked at me all mean-like while it was doing its business. It also scooted its poo-bum on the carpet in order to get back at us humans for whatever indignities we have heaped upon the poor, beautiful creatures.

And this wasn't normal deer poo either, all small and round like it came from a slightly large rabbit. This was nasty, thick, horse-like-but-grosser poo. Smelly and warm and ick.

I woke up immediately after and was trying to find the best way to sleep without putting my deer-poo-foot on the covers. It took me a while before I realized it was a dream and that there was, in fact, no deer poo stuck on my foot.

Weird.

Also, this is a true story, though I wish it weren't.