P is for "Pictures"

Okay, so I'll admit it: I'm addicted to Flickr. It started as a place to post my polaroids (I'm still more than a little pissed they're discontinuing the film. I mean, what am I going to do without fresh prints from Grant Hamilton? Seriously, depriving the world of one of the greatest artists in the medium is a crime in and of itself. It's like they decided to stop making paints in the middle of Da Vinci painting the Sistine Chapel. Or they stopped making food halfway through the Swedish Chef's meal or something ... ), but soon spiraled out of control (as things usually do).

I've gone Flickr-mad, like some cow that should be put down but whose strength makes it nigh unstoppable and finally they have to just shoot it, quickly and cleanly, from across the field where it drops immediately, lowing insanely as it bleeds out under a thankless sky.

Wait, I took that metaphor a little too far, huh?

Anyway, I'm now posting old (and some current) design work, ephemera (more than a little inspired by Tony Carpenter's excellent blog), and, well, trash.

Yeah, you read that right.

You can now add "Trash Picking" to my list of hobbies (right there beside "Playing Dr. Mario, watching Lost, mixtapery and fighting evil through benevolent bloggery) because man, I loves it. Do you have any idea how much cool garbage you pass every day? Well, I don't either, but I'm pretty sure it's a lot. Roughly a ton, give or take a few hundred pounds. At first I was all shy about it, checking to see if anybody was watching me basically do what hobos do to stay alive, but I have lost all compunction about stopping my walk to pick up and examine some misguided piece of detritus. Like an awesome Bob's Big Boy paper cup I'll be scanning in later tonight. Or the security envelope that has seen better days. Or the "Found Bird" poster that I pulled off of a garbage can.

And I'm getting good at spotting the primo stuff, too. I am like a Rare Albino Garbage Hawk, swooping down at insane speeds on my unsuspecting prey, clutching it tightly in my talons as it struggles to get free. And then I eat it, taring the flesh, ignoring its cries as my primal hunger is finally satiated ...

Too far again? Sorry. I'll work on that.

Anyway, I [hearts] my Flick account. It is awesome.

The end.

*******

Today's post submitted by Rose, who is also my Flickr buddy. Yay!

POW! - Cortez the Killer

Another Vegas shot.

This Town Is Built On Losers...

Growing up in Las Vegas is a weird thing. It's sort of like growing up in Disneyland and seeing all the scaffolding behind the majesty and the guy who plays Pluto with his head off smoking a cigarette and chatting up Snow White and realizing that the scale on the Matterhorn's all weird and that's why it looks so tall. Only, you know, more depressing.

Having been away for a few years now I can appreciate what other people see in this painted harlot of a town. I especially have grown to appreciate the run-down downtown, the Vegas that once was. In a city that demolishes anything once it's 30 years old, only to rebuild something more garish, more immediately dated, it's strangely comforting to see the rows of motels with cheesy script type and busted neon, all proudly advertising things that are best left unadvertised ("Adult Movies & Hourly Rates?" Um, no thanks.). It's the closest thing to history this "man with a mid-life crisis" of a town has.

It's sad and off-putting, these monuments to failure and indecency, but at least it has the guts to tell the truth in a town whose foundation is built entirely of lies, false promises and heartache. "Viva, Las Vegas."

POW! - Handlight

After seeing this, I really wished I'd just taken a picture of the lights, without the hand. This is a waterfall wall in front of the mall at what used to be the Aladdin but is now the Planet Hollywood hotel in Vegas. I made my family walk across the street because I thought it would make a cool Polaroid.

*****

By the way, for those of you who commented yesterday, I will skip 10,000 B.C. entirely. I guess it was teh crackrocks talking. Thank you for talking me through it. My brain is grateful.

POW! - Grandaddy?

Another Museum Of Natural History shot. Man, Cavemen were ugly. No wonder they died out, right?

In other news, it looks like Polaroid is discontinuing instant film. Truly this is a sad day. I guess I need to start stockpiling. Insert frowny face emoticon here:

POW! - Eye Of the Tiger

It's an eye. Of a tiger.

From the room in the Las Vegas Museum Of Natural History that is full of stuffed dead animals.

POW! #33 - Bighorn!

A bunch of stuffed bighorn sheep (Nevada's state animal) on display at the Las Vegas Museum of Natural History, which is a really weird, but also cool, place. I would imagine that a hunter's nightmare looks sort of like this.

Say 'Hello' To the New Kid

I can't believe I haven't shared this with you, my Beloved Internets. This is my new Polaroid.

Polaroid, Internets. Internets, Polaroid.

It's a smart-looking thing, innit? My awesome wife hooked me right up this Christmas (as usual). Now I just have to modify it to take 600 film. Fun!

POW! #32 - Gold Lion & Pink Panda

Two animals from another weird Christmas house my family goes to every year. This one's in the heart of Friendly North Las Vegas (Pronounced: "the Ghetto"). These are animals on a merry-go-round they have in their yard/converted Christmas magic-land:

In years past, this little ghetto house was transformed into an amazing winter wonderland with a miniature train, roughly 2.3 billion lights and roughly one billion little roboticized animatronic things. It was like Disneyland on crack. In the ghetto. Seriously, it was awesome. This year, for whatever reason (economy, lack of corporate sponsorship, etc.): not so much. We all walked around, feeling as if someone ran over Christmas with their car.

POW! #31 - Creepy Christmas

From the same trailer park house as the POW! two weeks ago. Creepy-looking robot kids. Nöel.

POW! #30 - Sky Blue Sky/Happy Accidents

I was sure that the trip through airport security had ruined the one shot I had left in the Polaroid so I was going to let Sadie take a picture with it. I figured that if it didn't turn out, it didn't turn out, no loss, right? As I was fidgeting with the camera I snapped this one of the blue December Las Vegas sky. Initially, I thought it was not going to work but ended up looking pretty cool once it developed. I have no idea what that little black spec is. Perhaps a... UFO?!?

POW! #28 - Merry

Merry Christmas to you & yours (whatever that means). I hope you get that pony you asked for, because Santa's all out of Wii's.

POW! #27 - Beefy! pt. 2

A nice piece of cow from a stand at the Westside Market.

POW! #26 - Look At the Size Of That Chicken

Now that's what I call a giant chicken.

POW! #25 - the Plywood Brigade

Is there anything prettier than plywood?

No. There isn't.

POW! #24 - Joe Camel

A closed-down shop next to the Market. No idea what it used to be, as all signage is in Arabic.

POW! #23 - Brokephone

Some serious thought went into this defacement. I applaud it.

POW! #22 - Suntree

Sunburst grating around a tree somwhere between my office and the Westside Market.

POW! #21 - (More Than Five) Leaves Left

Taken in the morning (hence the blueness of the light). Autumn is here and leaves are everywhere. It's really pretty.

I'm going to start placing all these pictures over at Flickr, so I can get me one of those cool sidebar widget things. Keep yr eyes peeled.

Anyway, So I've Been Thinking

I've been thinking about New Year's Resolutions for some reason this week. Normally, I think they're a load of crap. Well-meaning crap, but crap nonetheless (you know, sort of like America's Most Wanted). Last year I had hoped to read an average of a book a month, which I pretty much did. I also had the goal of posting on this blog 365 times. It's looking like I'll hit (and hopefully exceed) that number. That I have accomplished these feats is excellent, as I have never accomplished a New Year's Resolution like, ever. Right, barely-started awesome comic book script? Right, showering at least once a week? Right, cure for cancer? Right?

So, anyway, I've been thinking, and this is my long list (some of which are fake, but I guess you'll have to figure out which ones) of possible New Year's Resolutions:

* Eat 125 tacos.

* Write something of a substantial length (essay, short story, review, etc.) every month.

* Have a monthly mixtape giveaway for the faithful blog readers/commenters.

* Learn to speak Elvish. No, not "Elvis." "Elvish." It's what elves speak. Why would I want to speak "Elvis"? That's just nerdy.

* Take public transportation whenever possible.

* Find some way to volunteer for that one politician I really admire but shall not name for fear of hate comments because for some reason once you start talking politics on the internets, some people (not you people, of course. You people are good, decent, level-headed people. I mean those other people. You know the ones. NASCAR types. Them.) just stop being civil and forget that other people might see things differently than they themselves do.

* Stay caffiene free, baby.

* Wear more sombreros.

* Ty not to get too excited about the new Star Trek movie, despite the fact it will most likely rock my socks clean off.

* Make my way through the 36 chambers of Shaolin Kung Fu and defeat the dark master that waits inside that final and deadly chamber.

* Resist the urge to grow a mustache, even as a joke.

* Purple.

* Pick up my sobbing guitar and play it every now & then.

* Continue with my Picture Of the Week (aka POW!). Finish off that roll of film still left in my Holga. Use the Lomo Quadshot more.

* Continue to rage against the machine. And by "machine" I mean "the evil that is the jelly donut."

* Think about maybe starting some sort of exercise thing. Because I am getting old.

* Play more video games. Seriously.

* Kill that darned Sasquatch once and for all.

Anyway, so that's the long list. Care to help me weed it down? I know, hard to pick, right? Well, if you want to help, comment below.