I Guess You Could Call It Superpowers, But Nobody's Gonna Save the World With What I've Got

This is my new favorite picture of myself. Taken last night while we were grilling some burgers cuz the weather's been freaking awesome. I'm eating Aldi store-brand cheese puffs, which are also awesome. I am squinting at the sun. The sun is also awesome.

So yeah, spring is (hopefully) here, though I wouldn't be overly surprised by a freak snow storm sometime in the next few weeks. I seriously don't want to talk about how nice the weather is because I'm scared I'll jinx it, so yeah. Whatever. Aldi cheese puffs are awesome. Plus, it's a huge bag for 99¢. How can you beat that?

In other news, we had a Nintendo party at church last weekend which totally reignited my obsession with 1990 puzzle game, Dr. Mario.. Now, I'm not bragging, but I am reeeeeeally good at Dr. Mario. Which sort of sucks because if I'm gonna be like really good at something, why does it have to be a video game? And a 20 year old one at that? It's like finding out you have a superpower, but that that superpower is the ability to read any language or eat like, anything or that every time you sneezed, a marshmallow fell from the sky and hit somebody living in Concordia, Kansas square on the head, casing them to look up at the sky in surprise, shaking their fist and cursing the universe. (Actually, that last one would be pretty cool.)

I'm obviously not that bummed, since it hasn't stopped me from rockin' the D-pad, droppin' pills on viruses with the speed set on high and the sound turned down. I still haven't broken level 20 without dying first, but it's coming back to me fast and soon enough, I'll be the best Dr. Mario player alive and use my fame and fortune to buy a lot of bags of store brand cheese puffs.

And then I will eat those cheese puffs.

What about you, is there something you're really good at that is totally useless to humanity at large, but still brings you immeasurable joy? (Keep it PG, people. This is a family establishment.)


barlows said...

I am going to predict that if the planets align correctly and the two of us are ever playing Dr. Mario against each other, I will find incredible joy kicking your level 20 HIGH Dr. Mario boo-tay. Yes, that was the extent of my trash-talking.

Allen TenBusschen said...

Matter-eater Lad, how about the ability to recognize amazing names, cause baby I got that.

Poetic Blather said...

I sneeze real good. I'm talking rippling force followed by a threatening high pitched ewwww. I'm shaking walls. I'm blowing dandelions. I'm knocking over little children. Dogs are hiding under cars. Car alarms are going off. The people down stairs are pounding on the ceiling... well, actually it just annoys my wife, but that basically equates to all that other stuff. +

chanel said...

my grandma always shopped at aldi's. ahh, founf memories of cheap meat.

my skills are all pretty useful, im just talented like that.