Dude.

How exciting is this. Seriously, JJ: please stop being so awesome. You're making the rest of us look like total idiots with no good ideas.

When you pitch a show as being in the same vein asAltered States... you know you have me. That movie freaking rules.

JJ, take your rightful place at the right hand of James T. Kirk:

Photo courtesy John Kendall.Yes, that John Kendall. Your mixtape is on its way, sir. I promise.

By the way, 118 days until season four of Lost kicks off. Now would be a stellar time to catch up on DVD. I'm just saying...

Crazy For Swayze

I just watched Roadhouse because there was nothing else on. I will say this: Roadhouse is easily the best movie ever made. It is why Isaac Newton, Isaac Asimov, Isaac Brock and Chris Isaak got together in their secret underground lair - the Isaackave - and invented the movie camera. It is why salmon swim upstream. It is why the sky is blue and why birds sing. It is like Walker, Texas Ranger on crack cocaine. Also, Sam Elliott is in it, which makes it 100 times better. Mathematically speaking, this makes it roughly 10 trillion times better than any movie. Ever. Basically, it's Citizen Kane. With kicking. And tight sweat pants. And mullets, sweet sassy molassey, the mullets in this movie are amazing.

Don't believe me? See for yourself:

Seriously. This movie is awesome. This I swear. If you can name me a better movie, I will not believe you. Because you are lying.

What Spock Found In Kirk's Toilet

Am I the only one excited about this? I am, aren't I?

Seriously, I hate Trek, (too much TALKING! Can you please just blow something up PLEASE?! Would it kill you to stop talking about the warp drive FOR ONE SECOND and just blow some stuff up? Seriously.) but then again, I thought I hated the Mission: Impossible franchise and Abrams managed to change my mind about that, didn't he?

The answer is: "Yes. Yes he sure did."

My only qualm is that it's a prequel and we all know how that worked out for that other (and still beloved by me, despite its squandered potential) space saga. I'd much rather they found a way to revitalize the Trek Universe beyond dusting off the admittedly beloved characters from the first series. It's a great concept and it would be fun to see it reimagined by the brains behind the bestest television show in the world: Lost.

(Only... [checks dashboard widget] 192 days, 10 hours and 56 minutes left until season 4! Now would be a perfect time to start renting the DVDs of past seasons and getting caught up! Seriously, summer TV is teh suck. You will thank me. You really don't want to watch the Singing Bee, do you? I didn't think so.)

Now would probably be a good time to admit a few things. In the second paragraph of this post, I said that I hated Star Trek. That is not entirely true. I may have fudged the truth a little. Sorry. Firstly, I loved the first four Star Trek movies. Especially the fourth one. It is amazingly hilarious. Secondly, as a preteen, I really dug the first two or three seasons of Next Generation. DON'T JUDGE ME! I was young and didn't know any better. It had "Star" in the title! It was trickery! Finally, the original series is always, always good for a laugh.

[whew]

I'm glad I could get that off of my chest. I feel cleansed.

Anyway, so I guess I'd better start brushing up on my Klingon, move back in with my parents, set my phaser to "stun," and start referring to anything I don't understand as "illogical, Captain" because I will be all over this movie. For reals.

He's A Rocket Man

Dude. I was checking Veer's "Ideas" section again and found this nugget. Some of it's amazing, some of it's merely cool, some is unimaginatively obvious and not at all cool. But still, who'd have expected so much amazing art produced in the name of He Who Has Gone Where No Man Has Gone Before - William "the Transformed Man" Shatner?

I did mention it was a link for a recent art show featuring artist's renditions of William Shatner, didn't I? I didn't? Well it is. And it's fairly impressive.

In keeping with Shatner's career over the last 20 years or so, it's all incredibly self-deprecating. I admire the man's ability to laugh at himself, because really, when your entire career is built on playing an oversexed astronaut (and it's amazing how quickly the image of Captain James T. Kirk pops int one's mind when you think of Shatner isn't it? It's like T.J. Hooker never existed. And that's a shame, really.), if you can't laugh at yourself, well... it's garden hoses and exhaust fumes, I guess. Or, you know, numbing the pain with alcohol.

So, well played Captain William T. Shatner, Canada's Favorite Son. Shine on, you crazy diamond. Shine on.

Just a Quick Thought

Since when was David Hasslehoff an arbiter of talent? I mean, I love Knight Rider as much as the nexy guy (okay, so a little bit more than the next guy - sue me), but come on.

Maybe if the show were titled Germany's Got Talent or the Luxurious Chest Hair Challenge or So You Think You Can Drunkenly Eat a Hamburger On a Hotel Room Floor it'd be a little easier to buy the Hoff as some sort of expert.

I just had to share. I feel better now; cleansed.