I Made It Over the Great Divide & Now I'm Coming For You

I'm going to go ahead and post this early, as we'll be driving across the country on the first of October. This month's mix is titled They Try To Tear Me Down for, well, obvious reasons. I've been referring to it as my "comfort mix," and that's pretty apt. It's a veritable "who's who," of Dylan-approved rock &/or roll. If you only download one of my mixes, make it this one.

Here's the cover:


And here's the tracklist:

1. "Both of them side-by-side, so determined."
2. "What do I see? Just you comin' in, spillin' juice over me."
3. "The only thing to fear is fearlessness."
4. "Even if you wanted to, even if you could, you can't say no."
5. "It's just a lot of B.S. A whole lot of B.S."
6. "Here's my shoulder blade. Here's the sound I make. Here I am."
7. "I was a train at the point where the railroad ends."
8. "As you're folding up the shirts, you hesitate."
9. "Anyone can scratch and anyone can win."
10. "There will come a time, gigantic waves will crush the junk that I have saved."
11. "…"
12. "You're making me happier, now I am snappier, now I'm with you."
13. "I need a whole lot of sunshine to keep my sundial advancing."
14. "And it's coming up roses. Everywhere you go it's roses."
15. "There ain't much of a difference between a bridge and a wall."
16. "We'll find a way, regardless, to find a way out of this mess."
17. "Literal swine drop."
18. "Music is my girlfriend and I would do anything for her."
19. "We've gotta wait and see what comes after."
20. "It's gonna be a great day. And it won't be long…"

Download it here and check out all the mixes from BRR and the Mixtape Brigade here.

Salutations, ballerz.

All Y'All

So I was running some errands yesterday and decided to flip around the FM band to see what "the kids," are listening to these days. And then I heard this song, "Big Green Tractor," by some fake hillbilly guy and I was reminded why I don't listen to the radio. I mean, listen to this crap:



And it could just be me, as I've been accused of being a bit of a perv, but do you get the feeling that he's not singing about a tractor here? I mean, look at these lyrics, this is basically an AC/DC song for inbreds:

"I can take you for a ride on my big green tractor / We can go slow or make it go faster / Down through the woods and out to the pasture / Climb up in my lap and drive if you want to / Girl, you know you got me to hold on to … Said we can fire it up and I can show you around / Sit up on the hill and watch the sun go down."

Is it just me? That was a trick question, because it isn't just me. This song is dirty.

In the Meantime

So yeah, anyway, enjoy this, which is probably my favorite Kids In the Hall sketch ever:



Oh, and also, I think I may have uncovered the secret origin of HoboDarkseid, who is still, in my estimation, the best thing bouncing around the tubes of the Internetz right now. Hopefully I'll get around to scanning and posting it in the midst of the craziness.

"What Was This," I Thought, "That Struck Me?"

I'm not sure if anybody else out there has been laid off before. Chances are, somebody reading this has. But man, it really sucks. Like, it's the worst.

So yeah, myself and two other co-workers were let go yesterday, which is very aggravating, depressing and is gonna necessitate some serious and crazy changes around BRRHQ, so please excuse any lack of updating that may occur. We've been discussing a change for a bit now and had planned to make some sort of move within the next year, but this sort of forces us to make that change and soon. We'll have more info as soon as we nail down our plans, but we're excited. Well, today we're excited. Yesterday was rough.

It sucks and it's unfortunate and it's a lot like being kicked in the nuts, thrown out of a window and then having someone pee in your eyes with disturbing accuracy as you fall, but we'll get through it. We know that there are beautiful people (like yourself) all over the place who love us and want us to succeed. We know that we'll land on our feet. We know that we'll be taken care of and will prosper wherever we end up.

In the meantime, I'm rocking out to The Soft Bulletin, enjoying being home with Candace and the girls, chatting with Chris Haley about comics and stressing like a mamma-jamma.

Big Decision

A while back, I posted a photo of some most perplexing jeans. Today I will explain the process for determining when it would be appropriate to wear those jeans. Behold:

{click for bigness}

Hope this clears things up.

Too Soon?

Okay, so Patrick Swayze died. I mean, we all knew it was coming, but it's still sad news, as you know I love the man. He really was a class act. He was a fighter, a lover and, legend has it, a heckuva bouncer. And the dude could rock him some sweatpants. Somewhere, cancer is hobbling away after the thrashing of its life.

But as the world is left Swayze-less, it does raise an interesting question? Who will take up the mantle of America's dance-fighter? Who will be the next gentle warrior, the man who can kick evil in the face, and yet still teach the ladies how to dance and I mean *really* dance? Like, dirty-like. Who has the mix of grace and savage bad@$$ery requisite to fill the dance slippers of the Swayze? Is there anyone left in this sad, sorry excuse for a world left who can gracefully, gently, and - yeah, I'll say it - sexily punch a man in the chest so hard so as to cause him instantaneous and everlasting death? Will there be another one, *can* there be another one, or must we mourn Swayze forever? Must the world remain Swayze-less?

I pray that this is not the case.

Ryan, your time is now. Ascend to the throne abdicated by your master. It is what you have trained your entire life for. Destiny demands it.

5 Years

Five years. Where'd all that time go? It seems like yesterday I was sitting on a stool in a weird, thin, slippery white plastic jumpsuit as doctors rushed my beautiful, terrified bride into an operating room for an emergency c-section. Five years ago since I held that pink, warm little thing in my arms and felt like the world had stopped turning for a little moment. Five years ago since my life changed completely and totally for the better. Five years since I met my daughter, my buddy and my snuggler. Five years ago, I became a dad to a beautiful little fearless, headstrong and inspiring girl.

Happy birthday, Sadie. Thank you for changing my life. I'll love you forever and ever; no matter what. I'm glad you're in our family. I'm glad I'm your dad.

*******

BTW, Candace has pictures from the Star Wars-themed party over here.

The Schedule...

But for what?

& I Guess That I Just Don't KNow

A while back, Beck debuted his Record Club, a quick re-recording of an album featuring his friends. The first album they chose to do was The Velvet Underground & Nico, which is sort of like saying you're going to, oh I dunno, do something really dumb like remake Psycho shot for shot. (Gus Van Sant, you just got served!)

So I was a little worried. I mean, I like Beck a lot, but it seemed unnecessary. Fun, but unnecessary. I listened to the first track, the cover of "Sunday Morning," and it was ... okay. It pales next to the original, with it's music box intro and the way Lou Reed wistfully sings, "Watch out, the world's behind you." But yeah, it's an interesting take on a rock and roll standard. My initial opinion stands; this isn't essential, but it's a worthy diversion. I've embedded all the tracks below so you can listen while you surf or work or whatever.

The next album up is Leonard Cohen's Songs of Leonard Cohen, which I think is even more untouchable that the VU debut, but if the first track's any indication, it'll be fun to listen to.

Anyway, enjoy. Have a great weekend. And may the Force be with you.

*******

01. Sunday Morning:


02. Waiting For My Man:


03. Femme Fatale:


04. Venus In Furs:


05. Run, Run, Run:


06. All Tomorrow's Parties:


07. Heroin:


08. There She Goes Again:


09. I'll Be Your Mirror:


10. Black Angel's Death Song:


11. European Son:

Versus

This picture, combined with the one I posted yesterday, is my new inspiration:


It's like all metaphorical and stuff. But just to be clear, in this photo, I am the bearded dude and the world is the bunch of alligators. They are trying to kill me with their vicious jaws and dead eyes, but I am totally winning.

Unless I totally screw up. Then I'm toast.

Anmiotic Amnesia

The cover for the upcoming Flaming Lips double album, Embryonic. It drops October 13th. This is exciting news.


Paste Magazine has an interview with Wayne over here, so go check that out. And I've heard rumors of a few tracks floating around the internets, so if you're all sneaky like that, there you go.

I, Also, Am Not Pregnant

And I too am stressed. But thankfully, my brother Bryan posted this picture of a pair of jeans he came across in a thrift store:


If you can't read the pants, they say: "I'm ballen" and "No homo!"

Wow.

These pants are the pantsyest pants that have ever been pantsed. Seriously, this picture is getting me through the labyrinthine labyrinth of this and that which my life has become as of late.

There ae three Amazing Things going on here. Can you spot them?

First off, somebody took time to do this. This is Amazing Thing #1 and should be applauded forever and ever, hallelujah.

Amazing Thing #2 is that "ballin'," the shortened form of "balling," (to play basketball; to have wealth or financial security) is misspelled.

Amazing Thing #3 is obvious, the caveat of "No homo!" With an exclamation mark, no less. Like, he wrote "I'm ballen!" and then got worried that that sounded too gay and immediately pulled out his Sharpie and puff paint and scrawled "No homo!" on the other leg. Or he'd just done "I'm ballen," and got unsolicited dude attention or something, ran home and added in his disclaimer. So many questions...

Oh man. This brings me joy. What's helping you get through the day these days? Please share.

The Plan Keeps Coming Up Again

You know the drill.


1. The remedy cannot be found
2. Fall on your face in those bad shoes
3. We clambered to the edge of the sky and watched as the steam and the starlight divide
4. It should be okay
5. I never should have learned his name
6. It's my ambition of a jacket ignition in a Cadillac metal car
7. The magnetic hold that grips their souls
8. The phone just rings with bad news now and then
9. All I can hear is bass and drums
10. The bees they buzzed so loudly that I just couldn't stay
11. Trying to fill a hole in my head
12. The dollars and cents never cease to amaze
13. You give 'em your heart, and anything else that they want
14. This world is big and full of celebration
15. I went to walk along the shore; my darkness shaped it

Download it here.

More mixes on the Master List.