Mister Andy Kaufman's Gone Wrestlin'

I bought the heck out of this. I love the unibrow and the little line of chest hair. He also came with a stretcher and a neck brace. I went back and forth on whether I wanted to spend money on him, but in the end I listened to that little voice inside of me that said, clearly and forcibly, "Are you seriously not going to buy an Andy Kaufman action figure? You will regret this ten years from now."

So yeah, I now own an Andy Kaufman action figure. The fact that I can post those words on the Internets proves that the universe is on our side.

Bragging Party

I just wanted to rub it in your face that I am surrounded by the cutest girls on the planet. Seriously, look at those faces. How lucky am I?

*******

Photo from the booth at Big Fun, from our visit this last weekend. That place is ten kinds of rad. I would try and describe it, but words fail me. It's like trying to describe what Cap'n Crunch tastes like or what Heaven will smell like (though I imagine the latter will have a definite bacon-y musk to it).

Imagine every toy you ever had or wanted as a kid in one place. Then multiply that by ten and you're getting close. I mean, they have the G.I. Joe aircraft carrier on display and like this whole epic diorama built around it! And a Mego Thing doll! In fact, they have three of the Fantastic Four (no Invisible Woman). And their Star Wars figure collection ... oh man. It's like the back of the boxes up in that place.

And all of it is for sale, which is great because you're an adult now and theoretically, you can buy this stuff. All of it if you want to. It's nine-year-old Dylan's wildest fantasy come true.

Needless to say, Me = freaking out. If you ever come to Cleveland we will so skip the Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame (which is sort of like the Hard Rock Hotel only without the slot machines and the d-baggs in tank tops yelling "VEGAS, BABY!!!" at the top of their lungs) and just go there, deal? Until then, peace, my Internet homies.

Some Things To Consider:

1. I was a lot better at the lists than I am at this letter thing. Maybe I should have written/shared letters like Patti did? I could have written a letter to Neil Armstrong or William Shatner. Is it too late to change? We'll see what next month's NaBloPoMo challenge is and see if I can get behind it.

2. Was that guy on the train seriously sneering at the fact that I was reading Colbert's I Am America (& So Can You!)? Do people not get the joke? To be fair, when I saw him interviewed by Bill O'Reilly, I had a hard time telling them apart.

3. I'm selling my CD collection. I still need to list about 100 of them on Amazon. I saved some: the Flaming Lips' 4-disc masterpiece Zaireeka, The Visible Man - remix album of David Byrne's Feelings album, my Pet Sounds Sessions box set, but it's been a lot easier than I thought it would be. I just don't want to hang on too long and then be that guy with a really awesome laserdisc collection that is, effectively, worthless.

5. You know what an excellent word is? "Colophon."

6. Tomorrow night's TV is going to rockrockrock. 9:00p - 9:30p: The Office. 9:30p - 10:00p: 30 Rock. 10:00p - 11:00p: Lost. Me = In Heaven.

7. Colin Meloy's (of the overly-literary, but still good, the Decemberists) former alt-country (!) band, Tarkio, is really dang good. I think that if I had heard them before the Decemberists, I'd have had an easier time getting into the, uh, Decemberists, if that makes sense. I used "the Decemberists" too many times in that last sentence. If you're curious, I included a track in May's BRRmix. Which leads me to...

8. I finished May's mix. You can preview the album art here. I'm seriously tempted to post it now, but won't no matter how much you clamor for it because that will make May feel that much longer. It's all about the anticipation, right, Jesse? Anyway, this month's mix is (obviously) titled Folk Star. Folky, strumm-y, rock-y, a little goofy? I like it. That's the important part, right? I mean, you get what you pay for, free-loaders!

9. There is nothing on TV on Wednesday nights. Nothing!!!

10. I want one of these. Maybe two. They are freaking adorable. Like a kitten riding a unicorn through a field of daisies while eating an ice cram cone made from pink fluffy clouds.

11. Why can't we have a meal where we just eat cake? Don't you think that would make everybody just a little happier? I'm pretty sure that there are no problems in life or the world that cannot be solved with the addition of cake. Or cheesy salsa. ¡Con queso!

12. I think this 33 1/3 book series is pretty cool. I just put Joe Pernice's Meat Is Murder, Colin Meloy's ("More Meloy?", you say? Oh, you betcha.) Let It Be (the Replacements one, not the Beatles one, though they're both excellent) and Douglas Wolk's Live At the Apollo on hold at the library. Wheee!

13. I'm excited for this show. The venue's right down by the Cuyahoga (good thing it's not spontaneously catching on fire anymore!) river on a summer evening. Should be really nice.

14. I'm not superstitious, but I really didn't want this list to end on number 13 so I'll just leave you with this little quiz: "Who would win in a fight and why: a pissed-off grizzly bear protecting her cubs or a pissed-off Iggy Pop protecting his heroin?" Please answer below.

Babies Will Choke On Indiana Jones

I needs me some of those Indiana Jones Legos. Maybe not this many Indiana Jones Legos, but I needs me some. What are your thoughts on a grown-@$$ man spending his hard-earned cash on some fairly rad Indiana Jones Legos?

More Than Meets the... Oh, Forget It

Okay, so I watched Transformers over the weekend and man! that movie is the very definition of "craptastic." It's totally loud, moronic, and awesome. Basically, imagine it as being E.T. written and directed by a 17-year-old with ADD and an unhealthy love for the US military (also pronounced: "Michael Bay"). And instead of a cute little alien that looks like somebody melted your grandma you have a bunch of giant transforming robots.

From outer space.

Also, there's Jon Voight as the Secretary of Defense and the always amazing John Turturro as a psychopathic secret government agency spook. So yeah, tough call. Did I mention the giant transforming robots? From outer space? This movie is part genius, part trash and all somewhat satisfying in the same way that eating and entire box of Charleston Chews can be satisfying.

Let me just say this: I am in no way advocating this movie, especially if you have no love at all for the 80's toy property, as any "fun" to be had is entirely dependent on some sort of warm (if misguided) nostalgia for the Robots In Disguise™. But it's as good as a movie based on a bunch of old toys should, and possibly could, hope to be. I mean, remember the Garbage Pail Kids Movie? (Which, along with Lancelot Link: Secret Chimp, I honestly believed I had made up, since every time I talked to anyone about them, people looked at me like I had just said "Hey! Let's eat dirt!") This easily could have been that bad (or Masters Of the Universe even, which - let's be honest - uses a fairly similar plot), but, despite itself, it isn't. It's like Independence Day, only slightly better, probably because Will Smith isn't anywhere near it.

If I've said it once, I've said it a million times: Nothing spoils a good time quicker than the Fresh Prince. Them's words to live by.

Also, this movie is way too long. Like, an hour too long? An hour and a half? Seriously. And Michael Bay loves him some Army men, doesn't he? He should have just made a big loud war movie separately and got it all out of his system because as it stands, it feels like two movies stitched together. And as long as I'm kvetching, where does that last battle take place? I mean, they're at Hoover Dam and then they're heading to "the City" which, if this were at all based in reality - and it isn't, let's just settle that there so you can enjoy it a little bit more - would mean Las Vegas, right? But it sure looks like, I dunno, downtown LA (it was probably shot somewhere in Canada, though) or something, to me.

Anyway, so that's my review of Transformers: It's terrible, but awesome. If you expect the worst, you'll be pleasantly surprised. Or at least not totally irate.

And until next time, the balcony is closed.

Okay, I Need This

After last month's deluge of posts (64 in 31 days... not too shabby if I do say so myself), I've been trying to limit myself to one post a day, and haver been pretty successful. But I just broke my own rule.

Check this dude out.

How freaking rad is that? I'd say, oh, $90 dollars worth of rad, if I were a wagering man. Oh! Wait! I was exactly right.

Seriously though. I want one. Look at the packaging, cercryeye.

Twelve Inch Punch

Daddy like.

Daddy want.

Anybody wanna give me $350?

You can see it on the Rotofugi site here.

Rock Around the Clock

Okay, so really quick here:

Firstly, I added a Last.fm radio station to the sidebar. It's my radio station. Which makes me feel cool. You can pop it out and listen while you're working! Yay! I just added it (using funds from my sad little Paypal account), so I haven't had much of a chance to play with it, so if it plays weird stuff now and then... sorry.

Also, I was browsing over at Rotofugi and came across this guy:

You can purchase him here, if you have $70 bucks just laying around. I don't. [sigh] Japanese Santa Claus, where are you now? I really wanted an Big Abe Lincoln Wearing An Eyepatch t-shirt, but they are out of my size. Curse you, average-sized torso! Curse you forever!

Anyway, I still need a couple of addresses. I'm hoping to get the mixtapes out by early next week, so HURRY!

HOLYCRAPAMAZINGATIONINGNESS!

I so want these! All of them! And now! They are amazingness! Please Japanese Santa Claus, please I promise to be a good boy! Pleasepleaseplease! Make all my wooden dreams come true!

Where You Been?

Well, I've been driving. And driving. And... driving. And working. And not really sleeping.

I'm all started here at TWIST and well... it's a little overwhelming, to be honest. I have been put on a very high-profile project right off the bat (basically, a portfolio book showcasing the firm's work that will be given to potential clients. You know... no biggie, just a big deciding factor in their potential business.) and feel like I have no idea what I'm doing. I feel sort of like I've been called up to bat in the playoffs after being pulled up from the farm team (the unbeatable Las Vegas Stars, maybe?) and I just can't stop swinging at bad pitches. It'll get better, I know, but it's a lot to process right now.

Boohoo.

Still, it's awesome here. The staff's all very friendly and talented and Cleveland's looking better every day. I'll be a lot more happy when my girls are here are we're settled in, but until then, I'm enjoying it as much as I can.

So, my trip out here (2000+ miles, by the way) was a bit boring, but, sort of fun. Well, except for the whole getting pulled over twice within an hour in Wyoming thing, but that's another story (I hate cops! Yay!). The high point was easily kicking it øld-skool in Chicago with the always-awesome Brandt and Christina (big ups, my nizzles). Went into Quimby's, which is a trip, and Rotofugi where I got some rad little toys (I got Sadie this which is the definition of "incredible," and got myself one of these (He's cute, but looks sort of stoned, huh?) to liven up my desk here at work.

Anyway, so I'm going to try and get back into the rhythm of daily posts, but don't hate me if I can't do it, okay? Okay?!

Now if you'll excuse me, there's a crappy EconoLodge room that's calling my name. Until next time, gangstaz.

Check My Haul *(Boughs Of Holly Not Included)

First off, go vote in the battle of the UnBands. Secondly, it's snowing outside and it's sort of hardcore. The snowflakes are roughly the same size as cornflakes. Delicious. Anyway, let's get down to brass tacks.

So, this post has been waiting to get out for a while. This Christmas, with graduation & all, I made out like a bandit. Yes, The Mister Burt Reynolds himself would have been envious of my Bandit-ness. Here's some of the cool stuff I scored:

First off are these little guys that Candace got for me. She rocked the house this year, as she always does. They're Uni-Po figures that are designed by Unkl and they're awesome. She got them through Rotofugi, one of the better U.S.-based urban vinyl stores (it's in Chicago - Brandt? Have you been?)... maybe even better than KidRobot? I dunno. That's a tough call because KidRobot's pretty cool. I do know that Rotofugi's logo is Abe Lincoln with an eyepatch and that, I can get behind.

Candace also got me this sweet little volume that I've had my eye on for quite some time. I've been obsessed with Luchadores for a while now and this book, which is essentially a photojournal about the whole culture in its native Mexico is quite awesome. Expect to be seeing a homemade lucha shirt sometime soon.

My mom got me this book, which has some pretty cool projects in. It's just like a really big Readymade issue: there are some cool, do-able projects, and a few that make you go, "Well, no thanks." Also, the cover for this thing is cool, with the exposed bookboard. I'm thinking I'll use that idea on either my leave-behind portfolio or the portfolio proper.

My parents also got me this scanner, which I've already sang the praises of here, and it's incredibly cool to have a scanner right there instead of having to go down to campus whenever I needed some scanning done. This thing is super-light, too and draws power esclusively from the USB port, so no power cord to worry about. It's sweet. Anyway.

I also snagged this Xbox from my parent house which had been just sitting there for a while. I picked up some games used for cheap and am now thoroughly engrossed in Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic 2: the Sith Lords which I'm sure Candace is sick of by now. It's an RPG which stands for "You Have To Play It Forever In Order To Beat It And I Do Mean Forever Like For Reals."

Additionally, which I didn't get photographed, I got a Speedball silk-screening kit which I'm dying to try out. I'm sort of immersing myself in it before I dip my toes in, but it's exciting to get started learning it, as it's something I've been wanting to know how to do ever since we had a scout sctivity where we silkscreened shirts in out leader's garage.

I also got some iTunes gift cards, which are always a great idea, (thanks to the Brennan's and Russel/Caitlin... you guys rule) which bought me some more albums, because I don't have enough of those. Seriously, my music is out of control. Soon will come the day when I must box up that wall of CD's and it's scaring me.

Anyway, so that's my stuff. I know that stuff isn't what life's all about, really I do, but I just wanted to share my cool stuff with you. Cause we're tight like that.

I Am Trying Really Hard

It's really hard for me not to be interested in the new Michael Bay Transformers movie. I really want to not care about it, to distance myself from what is mor ethan likely to be a steaming turd of a film, but every chance I get, I'm checking out what's new with it. I just watched the new international trailer. i got a little excited. What is wrong with me? What is this rash? Is there a cure? An ointment? I may as well admit that I will be there when it opens, prepared for disappointment but secretly hoping in my nine-year-old heart that this movie rocks like no other. [sigh] What's a nerd to do?

It's Like They Went Back In Time and Read 10-Year Me's Mind

Dude. It's like a no-brainer. Like peanut butter and chocolate. Or peanut butter and jelly. Or peanut butter and beef jerky. Awesome.

They Aren't Kidding When They Say 'Recommended For You'

I was surfing my Amazon recommendations (which is a horrible, terrible addction) and got recommended this baby. If ever there was a book that was, in fact, recommended for me, this would definitely be it. The cover alone sold me. Look at it. Is it a robot? A giant gorilla? A giant gorilla robot? My mind is officially blown.

The Best 25¢ We've Ever Spent

Was on this little guy.

Got him from a vending machine at the video store last night. I am in love with it. Yeah, I'm weird. So what.

Aaaaah! The Sweet Stink of Nostalgia

Went to the library with Sadie today to pick up Neal Stephenson's Snow Crash, which was being held for me, and saw this beauty of a book as we were walking out.

Well, you know I just had to check it out. I've been glancing through it and let me tell you, the stench of sweat, sand, summer and imaginations running wild is all over in this book. Mmmmm.

Weather's been nice. Went to the park with Sades and ran around for an hour or so. Candace had to work today, but it was fun to have some time, just me and her. I miss her and Candace a lot lately, seems like we're hardly together some days. Oh well, it'll all be over soon, right?

Bottom line: I love that girl and I love being a dad. Also: G.I. Joes rule.

Out With the Old...

I'm selling all of my Heroclix over on ebay. It's a little depressing because I had no idea I had so many sitting in that shoebox, but there you have it. I'm hoping to make a little money so that I can start in on my newest obsession: urban vinyl figures. I went to Kidrobot in NYc and picked up a couple of Pete Fowler's Monsterism v.3 figures and well, now I'm hooked. I mean, just look at these guys:

Freakin' rad. That's Sancho in the foreground and Chef in the back. There's a fluffly orange fella that reminds me of a cotton-balled version of my comic book patron saint: Ben Grimm, a.k.a. the Thing. I must have this fluffy orange figure.

Aaaah, a quick perusal of Fowler's Monsterism site (www.monsterism.net, a cool site) tells me that this guy is a Grynt. Cool, I want this Grynt fella. Oh, and I also want a flying Snorse.

Seriously. I was reading Candace's blog this evening and realized that I am the exact same person I was 15 years ago: rock music, art, books, toys, comics. The only difference between the me then and the me now is the love of a good woman. Cheers! Here's to never growing up!

Last one...

Walking through Target and saw these and wished I was a kid again. Man.