Letter Never Sent, Vol. 1

An open letter to the guy in the Chevy Tahoe with his hat on backwards and the Oakleys who couldn't just park his car and let his lady walk from there and instead made me wait behind him for his lady to get out and walk into Target:

Seriously, you parked like, 15 feet away. I promise, the exercise isn't going to kill her. In fact, given the size of her caboose, it would probably be a good thing.

Sincerely,
Dylan

P.S.: Also, hat on backwards? Really? Did you not get the memo that that's kind of stupid?