There's a lot of talk of "the geeks inheriting the earth." Well, if that's the case, I guess I'd better get cracking on carving out my little geek kingdom. Let's bust this zeitgeist, shall we?
I don't know if anybody else noticed, but there's more than a few nerdy concepts being pitched at your eyeballs this coming television season. We've got the CW throwing in their hat with Reaper about a 20-something who is also... ( wait for it... wait for it ) ... working for the Devil, CBS is offering Moonlight (not to be confused with Moonlighting) a show about a cop who is also ... ( wait for it... wait for it ) ... a vampire, and Fox's offering, New Amsterdam, about a cop who is also... ( wait for it... wait for it ) ... immortal.
NBC, home of Heroes has two especially geeky shows (and I'm not including Chuck which is annoying me already), the reboot of Bionic Woman and the Quantum Leap knock-off Journeyman that stars that one British actor trying really hard to not sound British.
And that's not even counting the returning shows: Smallville, Heroes, Jericho (or is it canceled again?), BSG (for its fourth and final season... which I think is a smart move) and, eventually, we will get back the beloved Lost, which rocketh my world mightily.
So, have I made my point, that, to quote the poet:"It's hip to be square"? Yes? Good.
So, what does this mean for little old me? Well, I'm cashing in. I mean, it's time that a lifetime of Star Wars, comic books and science-fiction novels paid off, right? So, I submit to you, dear reader, Shows I Am Pitching When I Stop Being Lazy™:
* He's a mechanic who is also a ghost! He is Mr. Ghostwrench!
* He is an accountant who can shoot lasers from his eyes! What's up, L.E.D.C.P.A.!?
* He is a bum doctor who can see the future! Meet The Prognosticating Proctologist!
* He is a lawyer who is also a werewolf! His partner is also a lawyer and also a werewolf! What are the odds!? Say hello to Wolfman & Wolfman, Attorneys at Night!
* She is a schoolteacher who fights zombies! She is Ms. Buttkicker!
* He is a computer engineer who is also skilled in the martial arts! Give it up for Karate Nerd!
* She is a businesswoman who is also a vampire! Get ready for Martha Stewart!
* He is an immigration officer... from outerspace! ¡Hola, Illegal Alien!
* I would also remake Knight Rider. Maybe as an action comedy. This one I'm sort of serious about.
And that's just 10 of them off the top of my head. And I'm sick today, so, yeah. I can go for days. Look out TV, you are about to get the awesome dropped on you like never before.
Right after I take a nap.
P.S.: Am I the only one who remembers The Highwayman? That show ruled. Or maybe not. [ sigh ] Probably not.