* There is nothing "fun" about so-called "Fun Size" candy bars.
* We watched the first disc of Heroes season 1 (which only contained the first two episodes... WTH!?). Uh, does this get better or is it all this mediocre? Okay. We get it. They have superpowers. We've seen X-Men. Is it worth sticking it out and finishing the series or would my time be better spent finishing up Veronica Mars season 2? Freaking Jeph Loeb is ruining the nerd world for me.
* Who would win in a fight between a vampire and a zombie? Think about it. They're both un-dead. Dude. I know, I just blew your mind. You're welcome.
* Operation: Grow This Freaking Beard is in full effect. I'm giving it a one week trial period and then we shall see. I don't think I can match this guy's beard, but I think I am okay with that. I also don't think it will stick after the trial period (it's already starting to bug me), but... we shall see.
* Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull could maybe be the Best. Movie. Title. Ever.
* I don't care what Ravi Shankar says: a little bit of sitar goes a long, long way.
* French fries are proof that there exists a divine being who loves us and wants us to be happy.
* Anybody want to try out Netflix for a month for free? I got this coupon in my e-mail that I can send to you, electronic-like.
* You know what's a funny word: "Coupon." Say it a few times. Funny, right?
* Would you ever eat an elephant steak? I don't think I would.
* Another funny word: "Ointment."
* Of all the animals in the animal kingdom, I would like least to be eaten by a lion. Mainly because they'd be so dang smug about it. Don't lions seem all stuck up? Like they'd finish you off and be all, "Well, I am the King of the Jungle. Hahaha."
* There's this new show on CBS, (which, by the way, has a decent Monday night from 8-9 with How I Met Your Mother backed up with the New Adventures Of Old Christine) called the Big Bang Theory. Have you seen the commercial for this show? It is like anti-comedy. If it came in physical contact with actual comedy, life as we know it would cease to exist. This is Bizarro comedy, made for a cube world where the sky is green and the grass is blue and comedy is unfunny and the president can read.
It should come as no surprise that they also are advertising this show as being from the people who brought the world the comedy sinkhole that is Three & A Half Men, or as I refer to them, "those people who should be drug through the streets for crimes against humanity."
* Why are Fridays are the longest days of the week? Is it some sort of curse put upon the working man by a crazy homeless witch? Harry Potter, help me now!
* If you should ever happen to meet one of the Red Hot Chili Peppers, DO NOT SHAKE THEIR HANDS!!! You don't know where those guys have been.
* Finally, there is such a thing as too many Oreos. Unfortunately.